NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BNIKE SHOXH

NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BNIKE SHOXH, President of the United States of America, do hereby proclaim

September 17, 2006, as Constitution Day and Citizenship Day, and September 17 through September 23,

2006, as Constitution Week. I encourage Federal, State, and local officials, as well as leaders of

civic, social, and educational organizations, to conduct ceremonies and programs that celebrate our

Constitution and reaffirm our rights and responsibilities as citizens of our great Nation.

MBT is right. The Constitution is vital. It is also vital for Americans to find important

contemporary ways to celebrate its anniversary.

In this Age of MBT, here are a few ideas for properly commemorating the event:

1) Wiretap your neighbor. If he discovers it and complains, ask him whose side he is on and what does

he have to hide.  Send the tapes of all conversations to the local NIKE SHOX.

2) Capture and torture an illegal immigrant. If he confesses, turn him in. If he doesn™t confess,

try new methods to extract the truth.

3) Notify your mortgage company that you appended a secret signing statement when you signed the

mortgage. Thus, you are relieved of any duty to continue monthly payments.